Since I've started my 365 Days of Gratitude Through My Lens photo project, I've become a little concerned that people might start to think that my life is all rainbows and butterflies, scattered with children with adorable eyes and gorgeous grins. The adorable eyes and gorgeous grins part is true (Seriously, what do you want me to say? We're passing on some really good genes here.), but the rainbows and butterflies part would be more accurately described as thundershowers with a sprinkling of elk intestines.
I know you think I'm joking, but I'm not. I don't joke. I'm also going to rise above your doubt and spare you any photo proof.
So there I was, finishing up editing a bunch of photos of sweet children on their horses at STRIDES, when Kyle starts watching a video he borrowed from his buddy. I don't know the title because I'm too scared that I might actually catch a glimpse of the cover art to even look.
"Hey Bri, check this out!"
I turn around to see a guy pulling the stomach and intestines out of a dead elk. The only coherent thought I had, besides a slathering of disgust, was: "Is he serious!?"
Who on Earth married this guy anyway!?
He just sat there snickering.
The worst part was, as I sat there editing, I kept feeling this sick compulsion to turn around and look. It was just like driving past the scene of a fatal accident. You try to avert your eyes, but to no avail. You slow down, your eyes drawn to the shocking wreckage. Finally I figured I was better off in my bed reading a good book. I was right.
I'm married to a redneck. My children are headed down this path. My oldest recently informed me that I needed to sign him up for the hunter's safety course so he can start hunting when he's eight. I stared at him, teetering between washing his mouth out with soap and getting him therapy. I chose not to answer and silently kicked myself for naming him Hunter. It was all part of my husband's elaborate plan . . . well, as elaborate as redneck plans get.
I should do something drastic, but instead I'm going to go cook dinner. Mostly because my husband just got home and is now re-watching that same video . . . with all of my children. Where are my butterflies and rainbows again?